dark wings

i sensed the dark wings gathering….

through the ethers things happen that we can’t control –
even through prayer,
even through supplication, or the wild twistings of grief,
even through temper tantrums and contrite pleading…

the mystery moves in its own way,
so far beyond our own ken….
which is so good….
for how often we muddle things up when we have our way!

look at the perfection that can be arranged for you if you let go
and release your grip on rightness…. on safety…. on predictability…..

a brother can turn up at his mother’s grave after eighteen years
and meet all his siblings….
and they can have ice cream and plan their secession from the city,
and laugh
and cry
and be utterly, irrevocably amazed….

and healing can flow through and around each of them
absolutely without their control….
only because they all gave in to the mystery,
and followed the promptings of the dark wings….

became quiet enough, and humble enough,
and allowed enough love into their beings,
to feel the directions,
and follow their hearts
to each other….

and all is not wild honey or thornless roses or eternal butterflies….

but the limitless magic in letting go made itself known,
and wrapped itself around them like a cloud,
like a mist made partly of tears, and partly of the sighs of a mother….

and we felt her giggled blessings,

and allowed each other’s imperfections to find a loving spot within us….

this is the great blessing
of the dark wings:

love
wild and sad
soft and flexible
accepting of imperfections
acknowledging of pain and need

and one another….

laughter
funny stories

and parting with the truth of a sharp knife…
painful
quick
forgiving….

the dark wings quietly wreak their magic
and rain down blessings on those that give in to them….
those who agree to live in love and pain….

with a side of surprise and delight….

_______
© 2010
Beth Anne Boardman

4 May 2010

(photo courtesy kyle harrington)