amazement is a choice

amazement is a choice….

green leaves are not….

here are the things that amaze me:
everything.

but only if i sit still and stop worrying….

mary oliver says that there is singing in a leaf….
i believe her….

i’m pretty sure i’ve heard them singing to me….
or at least whisper….

i remember once
hearing great sheaves of palm fronds whispering over me
as i napped
in the middle of a sundrenched june,
cradling the jumping daughter inside me….

i remember hearing the soft voice of my husband
murmuring to our little son
on the patio outside our bedroom window --
and my son’s lilting voice,
asking the most adorable questions about bugs….

all these long years of happiness and disaster later,
these memories still bring sweet tears to my eyes….

and those palm fronds are still whispering….

i’m convinced
what they whisper
are blessings….

and now i know the secret to amazement --

even amid chaos
even in noisy bars
or midtown traffic….

if i can just remember to touch it….
silence flows everywhere….

it’s how the old wise ones have developed such deep laugh lines
around their eyes and mouths….

practicing their buddha smiles….

they’ve been finding amazement
in the dirt
in love
in despair and tragedy….
in rain and mud and starvation and dancing….

in shattered last breaths....

some call it magic
some call it god

and some miss it altogether
racing around in their twirling dramas…..

and that –

that, my lovely friend,

that is amazing too…..

_______________
© 2010
Beth Anne Boardman


[mary oliver's poem
'what can i say'
appears in
swan: poems and prose poems
boston: beacon, 2010]