Today I went to a sad
rocky beach and found sand!
All day I had been
walking by pictures of people gone
from my life,
and listening to
silences
and music,
and time seemed such
a mystery!
I don’t want it to be
sad.
I just wanted to sit
and observe
that, wow:
here I am at this age
and in this place
with all this behind
me
and who knows what in
front of me....
And I didn’t want to
go to the rocky beach,
because it used to be
sandy and we swung there
and jumped into
it....
But I went there
anyway.
And there was sand!
And then I was
confronted with
this vast fertility --
this ocean,
embarrassing with its
richness of life and bounty and
breathtaking
in its ability to
humble and snuff --
at the bash of a
crystalline
translucent
aqua
foam-tipped
wave....
Then I realized
the ocean captured
me,
threw its salty net around me
long ago!
I used to consider
myself a proud mountain girl,
who had curiosity yet
disdain for the ocean
and the people who
came from the ocean....
But I knew somewhere
in this disdain was a calling,
and now I’m here for
twenty-five years and I love it.
The salty ocean is my
salt blood
and my salt tears....
Next to her I feel
small
and kin.
(And yes I say girl
at my age:
girl sounds like
whirl and curl and unfurl –
all things that waves
do
and I like to do.)
There’s something about
time and tides and life and
cycles and sand that
seems gone and then comes back....
The sea is time --
it is the great
equalizer....
And beside it
nothing really
matters
except loving it
so.....
_________________
©2014
beth anne boardman
